10,000 BC

Well this is a film that i was a) reluctant to bother watching in the cinema, b) reluctant to rent and c) fell into watching when i had absolutely nothing to do last week. I am afraid to say it was almost a complete waste of time, sorry did i say almost. It was a total waste of time. OK so some of the graphics were impressive, but cmon if you want a visually stunning film you can watch Sin City or any number of quality sci fi's or war films and your bound to get great cinematography.

The real problem with this was the failure of the film to really feel like a flowing story. You start with a load of Mammoth hunters in an icy terrain/Tundra one of whom is going to become the next great leader, so far so good. Then the horse demons come, obviously at this point I'm expecting a 13th Warrior style movie with a battle between the hunters and the people who came on horses to raid the village possibly from a more advanced Viking race or something given the Arctic conditions.

Instead what we get is a legend/prophecy which takes us across Africa uniting all of the Tribes with the hunters to claim back the people who were taken in the numerous raids by what turns out to be Slave Traders. Now, i don't know for sure but unless I'm mistaken I'm pretty sure horse riding slave traders would not really have come across sabre tooth tigers or giant dinosaur birds and i don't know if they would travel across the whole of Africa just rounding people up but leaving a load of others then trotting past them to go to the next much much further away tribe.

We end up in Egypt, where else!?!?!, where the dastardly Egyptians are using said incarcerated slaves to build the pyramids to great effect. Que typical slaves/mob turns on rulers action scene (think really bad version of Stargate which curiously Roland Emmerich also demonstrated maybe he was running out of idea with this one) and we get what the prophecy obviously predicted.

The one saving grace of the movie is the stunning Camilla Belle but even just looking at her doesn't quite get you through the pain as she is barely in the film. Poor Script pretty terribly acted and just a load of bollox really.

2/10

Mix from They Said OK!!!!!

Hey got alerted to this mix on twitter its a banger, Laser Laser is a quality Daft Punk style tune and there is some quality fidgit in there as well... This guy is playing some brilliant stuff keep your eyes peeled and ears cupped

track listing and link to the download below:

http://www.zshare.net/audio/5545767712bc2b41

01- Gooseflesh - Blow up
02- Lies in Disguise - Meet your replacement
03- Heartsrevolution - Ultraviolence (Les Petits Pilous remix)
04- Diplo (feat. Rye Rye) - Wassup Wassup (Crookers remix)
05- Dani Deahl - (feat. Whiskey Pete) - Poppin bottles (Dani Deahl mix)
06- Neo Tokyo - Laser Laser
07- Yuksek - Take a ride
08- Crookers - What up Y'all
09- Elize Doolittle - Rollerblades (Party Sausage remix)
10- Heartsrevolution - Switchblade (Designer Drugs remix)
11- The Ropes - Water and headphones (Mr. Vega remix)
12- Shinichi Osawa - Push (La Mode remix)
13- Beni - My love sees you
14- Flosstradamus (feat. Caroline Polachek) - Big bills

Into The Wild

In Bruges

If you have seen the poster or the advert then you probably have a good idea of what this film is about, a couple of gangsters get sent to Bruges one loves it one absolutely hates it and much mayhem and mischief follows. A veritable mixed kebab of comedy and crime. The crime often instilling a couple of laughs in the viewer as well.

Great bit of casting in this film. Colin Farrel does a great job as Ray the bored, broody, visceral and troubled 'Ray' who hates Bruges and all the 'fairytale' connotations that go with the Medieval city. As the central character to the story its essential that there is a decent connection with this character and the acting and script deliver spectacularly. His position as a bored child looking to cause trouble is brilliantly opposed by Brendan Gleesons 'Ken'. Ken is your typical dad on holiday wanting to go to all the churches and 'places of interest'. His father figure is continuously interrupted by the fact he is a gangster and this adds lots of comedy moments like when he decides to bosh a load of cocaine, which has just been stolen from Ray after his date tries to rob him! The significance of the relationship is essential in the discussions that they have about death and highlights the naivety of Ray and his fear of death brilliantly against Ken's older wiser mentality.

The relationship between the two main characters is, apart from the hilarious dialogue, the thing that holds the film together so well. If it wasn't for this relationship and the bond you experience through it the film would feel like a load of midget jokes and swearing and not much else (fuck is used on average 1.18 times a minute!!!). Ralph Feinnes also does a great Ben Kingsley impression as their crazy but brutally loyal boss 'Harry'.

There are also some brilliant scenes involving jimmy (the racist, prostitute loving, ketamine fuelled Midget) and Chloe (Rays love interest) and a very linguistically astute Arms Dealer. The hilarious dialogue keeps the film going along brilliantly and is interrupted by some great action scenes and a couple of brutal deaths. Here are a couple of the best pieces of dialogue from the film:

Ken: [Ray walks into the bar high on cocaine] How'd your date go?
Ray: My date involved two instances of extreme violence, one instance of her hand on my cock and my finger up her thing which lasted all too briefly - and then I was away - , one instance of me stealing five grams of very high-quality cocaine and one instance of me blinding a poofy little skinhead: so all in all... my evening pretty much balanced out, fine.

Ray: A lot of midgets tend to kill themselves. A disproportionate amount, actually. Hervé Villechaize off of Fantasy Island. I think somebody from the Time Bandits did. I suppose they must get really sad about like... being really little and that... people looking at them, laughing at them, calling them names. You know, "short arse". There's another famous midget. I miss him but I can't remember. It's not the R2D2 man; no, he's still going. I hope your midget doesn't kill himself. Your dream sequence will be fucked.
Chlo: He doesn't like being called a midget. He prefers dwarf.
Ray: This is exactly my point! People going around calling you a midget when you want to be called a dwarf. Of course you're going to blow your head off.

Overall a good watch and a great mix of serious and silly conversation and testing questions about life and retribution. I recommend it.

7/10